Seriously!
What pants-on-head ****** came up with the idea of forcing a permanent internet connection onto people in order for them to play a single player game? If you don't have a permanent internet connection, you can't start the game. If your internet connection drops, the game will pause and will only resume once the connection is restored. This is all providing you can actually run the game in the first place.
I have an internet connection. It's stable, it's wired and it's 20 mbit or so. That's why I was able to install the patch for Settlers 7. You know, download and install it from the f--king internet that I'm wired to at this very moment. It's what enabled me to download and install the patch for the Ubisoft Game Launcher. It's what enables me to write this post right this very instant!
So why the bloody hell am I sitting here, staring at the Ubisoft Game Launcher telling me it couldn't connect and that I need an internet connection to play the game? I have a f--king internet connection, you dumb script! How the hell do you think I installed and patched the game in the first place?
After three frustrating tries where the Ubisoft Game Launcher would idle out for 10 minutes while undoubtedly performing various sexual acts on my hard drive, I decided to go online to find the solution. One site says that the release date in UK is on the 26th of March, which is today, but I bought the game yesterday. Why the hell do you release a game before the release date if people can't play it on that day anyway? Not to mention, why can't I log in on March the 26th in the first place?
People are reporting connection issues all over the world, from Australia to France to the US. Ubisoft have been unsurprisingly silent during this entire time, but one person did get in contact with their customer service who suggested he followed three easy steps to make it work:
Step 1: Shut down your firewall and anti-virus.
Step 2: Clear all cached and temporary files.
Step 3: Reboot Windows in Safe Mode, uninstall the game and reinstall it by copying the entire contents of the DVD to your hard drive first. Run the game with firewalls and anti-virus (plus every other background application) turned off.
Come to think of it, I believe there was a fourth step.
Step 4: Put underpants on your head and say 'Blrpblrpblrpblrp' for ten minutes as you notice that a tech guy told you in all seriousness to disable firewalls and anti-virus programs on a computer that requires a permanent internet connection to play the game.
Are they f--king retarded? Seriously, you need a permanent internet connection to play the game and they're suggesting you disable your firewall and anti-virus while playing? Are they mentally ill?
Edit: Post was purely written for venting purposes. Thank you for your time.
Edited, Mar 26th 2010 9:27pm by Mazra