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I really wish I could help you more
You have already helped me a ton and I appreciate it. Something I should have said to start with is that I got the Linksys Befsx41 4-port router which has a dedicated line for the DMZ host which I use for the ps2. I was under the impression that would eliminate the need for individual port opening settings but I set tehm anyway in addition to using the DMZ line. As for the ports I opened it went like this:
I followed the advice from the FAQ on this board (as well as playonline) that says:
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Make sure the following ports are open on your router/firewall:
-TCP 25, 80, 110, 443 or 50000 - 65535
-UDP 50000 - 65535
So I opened the ports like this:
start: 25 end: 25 TCP
start: 80 end: 80 TCP
start: 110 end: 110 TCP
start: 443 end: 443 TCP
start: 50000 end: 65535 TCP
start: 50000 end: 65535 UDP
Something else I discovered today that seemd odd to me but may explain some things:
If I run ps2->modem it works great
If I run ps2->router->modem(without my pc hooked into the router as well) it worked well.
If I run ps2->router->modem (with pc hooked into the router as well) I get booted from FFXI within 5 minutes of playing.
Thanks again for helping me so much I hope this new info can shed some light on my problems.