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#1 Dec 12 2011 at 11:36 PM Rating: Good
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A GREEN-TILED OPERATING ROOM. A TRAY OF SURGICAL INSTRUMENTS. A MIRROR. THE FEELING OF FREE IPADS GROWING INSIDE OF YOU.
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#2 Dec 12 2011 at 11:48 PM Rating: Good
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Sweetums wrote:
THE FEELING OF FREE IPADS GROWING INSIDE OF YOU.

It's a good thing you're in a hospital, that can't be good for you.
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#3 Dec 13 2011 at 12:17 AM Rating: Excellent
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You keep your god damned mac germs away from my intestines damn it!
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#4 Dec 13 2011 at 12:53 AM Rating: Good
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Dread Lörd Kaolian wrote:
You keep your god damned mac germs away from my intestines damn it!
EVERYTHING YOU TOUCH BECOMES A FREE IPAD. YOU'RE HUNGRY AND YOU DON'T KNOW WHY ANY OF THIS IS HAPPENING.
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#5 Dec 13 2011 at 12:55 AM Rating: Good
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FREE IPAD

WRONGFUL IMPRISONMENT IS A CRIME.
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#6 Dec 13 2011 at 12:57 AM Rating: Good
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Ok I want to have what ever your on Sweetums.
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#7 Dec 13 2011 at 12:58 AM Rating: Excellent
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Tailmon wrote:
Ok I want to have what ever your on Sweetums.
Drink deeply of the only twitter feed I keep up with
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#8 Dec 13 2011 at 12:16 PM Rating: Good
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Some of these are quite funny.
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#9 Dec 13 2011 at 2:56 PM Rating: Good
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I'm not sure if this surrealist horror, or if I should start practicing alchemy.
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#10 Dec 13 2011 at 3:45 PM Rating: Excellent
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Either way, it's kinda awesome.
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#11 Dec 13 2011 at 5:46 PM Rating: Good
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Nice.
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#12 Dec 14 2011 at 12:38 AM Rating: Excellent
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Apple. Alchemically turning gold into warmed over ********* since 1980.
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#13 Dec 14 2011 at 12:49 AM Rating: Excellent
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Dread Lörd Kaolian wrote:
Apple. Alchemically turning gold into warmed over horsesh*t since 1980.
NEW MOPED FAST ENOUGH TO OUTRUN WOLF-SIZED SPIDERS. AVAILABLE IN COLORS AN ARACHNID WOULD FIND HIGHLY VISIBLE.
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#14 Dec 14 2011 at 12:57 PM Rating: Good
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Sweetums wrote:
Dread Lörd Kaolian wrote:
Apple. Alchemically turning gold into warmed over horsesh*t since 1980.
NEW MOPED FAST ENOUGH TO OUTRUN WOLF-SIZED SPIDERS. AVAILABLE IN COLORS AN ARACHNID WOULD FIND HIGHLY VISIBLE.


PRETZEL VENDOR GIVES YOU A DECK OF CARDS SHOWING PHOTOS OF PEOPLE LOST AT SEA. TWO OF HEARTS IS A BLOODSTAINED MIRROR. YOU NOTICE THAT THESE PRETZELS ARE MAKING YOU THIRSTY. SO THIRSTY.
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#15 Dec 14 2011 at 5:29 PM Rating: Excellent
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uhh... GO NORTH?
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#16 Dec 14 2011 at 9:33 PM Rating: Excellent
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acprog wrote:
uhh... GO NORTH?
I wouldn't do that unless you have a lantern.
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#17 Dec 14 2011 at 11:44 PM Rating: Excellent
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Sweetums wrote:
acprog wrote:
uhh... GO NORTH?
I wouldn't do that unless you have a lantern.


YOUR LANTERN DIMS IMPERCEPTIBLY. THE THINGS BEYOND THE LIGHT'S EDGE INCH CLOSER, READY. IN THE NEARBY DARK, A FREE IPAD.
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#18 Dec 15 2011 at 2:08 AM Rating: Excellent
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IDrownFish wrote:
Sweetums wrote:
acprog wrote:
uhh... GO NORTH?
I wouldn't do that unless you have a lantern.


YOUR LANTERN DIMS IMPERCEPTIBLY. THE THINGS BEYOND THE LIGHT'S EDGE INCH CLOSER, READY. IN THE NEARBY DARK, A FREE IPAD.


EAT IPAD
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#19 Dec 15 2011 at 3:04 AM Rating: Excellent
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Programmer needs food badly!
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#21 Dec 16 2011 at 4:32 PM Rating: Excellent
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Co-worker of mine won an Ipad at work the other day, He didn't know you have to pay tax on it, part time employee paying 40% tax on a $600 device is funny.
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#22 Dec 16 2011 at 5:19 PM Rating: Excellent
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Sweetums wrote:
Programmer needs food badly!


Badly might be an overstatement *pats gut*. Blue Valkyrie, on the other hand, could use a sammich.

/ Lost almost ten pounds this week. 2 severely herniated disks + treatment = 2 months of not being allowed to do much of anything, but I got the OK to start working out Monday. Woo! This is good since we're (band) shooting a video in a couple weeks.
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#23 Dec 16 2011 at 6:45 PM Rating: Good
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Tyrrant wrote:
Co-worker of mine won an Ipad at work the other day, He didn't know you have to pay tax on it, part time employee paying 40% tax on a $600 device is funny.
The joy of living with someone who works for the IRS is to ask how probable a hypothetical auditing would be
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#24 Dec 17 2011 at 12:11 AM Rating: Excellent
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Sweetums wrote:
Tyrrant wrote:
Co-worker of mine won an Ipad at work the other day, He didn't know you have to pay tax on it, part time employee paying 40% tax on a $600 device is funny.
The joy of living with someone who works for the IRS is to ask how probable a hypothetical auditing would be

When major companies like Comcast give out stuff like that they have to tax the item as if it were a gift and gift taxes are around 40%. People in Hollywood had ******* about this a few years back because they had to pay taxes on the "door prizes" they give to the actors at awards shows.
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#25 Dec 17 2011 at 6:29 AM Rating: Good
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Tyrrant wrote:
Co-worker of mine won an Ipad at work the other day, He didn't know you have to pay tax on it, part time employee paying 40% tax on a $600 device is funny.


Gift taxes are imposed on the donor, not the receiver. If the company told the employee they needed to pay that tax, it would constitute fraud, unless the receiver voluntarily agreed to pay the tax, in lieu of the other party, in which case it can't be soaked by the annual exclusion limit. (since otherwise it would be such an easy way to do hilarious amounts of tax chicanery.)

IIRC, the donor org can't hinge the receipt of the gift on agreeing to pay the tax, but I'm not 100% on that.

Edited, Dec 17th 2011 7:34am by Timelordwho
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#26 Dec 17 2011 at 6:33 AM Rating: Decent
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Are you sure? I remember a story about a guy achieving his dream and winning a chance to go up into space but he had to decline because he wouldn't be able to pay the tax since the trip was written off as a gift.
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