Strange thing last night. About midnight, I'm sitting in my room playing FFXIV, and I hear a knock on my front door. Rarely do I ever get visitors, and even less so at midnight. So I get up, walk into the living room, unlock the door and crack it open. A drunk woman is there and says "Hi, I'm wasted and lost, can you drive me to "x and x" corner."
Turns out she was only about 5 blocks from where she wanted to be if she cut through the woods, but it was pitch black. So I put my shoes on and put her in the back of my vehicle. Drove around, stopped at the corner. She was struggling to open the door (drunk and all) so I told her to hold on, and I hit the door open button from the front. Side door starts to slide open, and she tries squeezing out before it gets fully open. Since it's an auto door on a van, it sees resistance, switches directions, starts to close on her, sees resistance, switches directions, starts to open again. She pops out, then stumbles away. Not sure what direction she ended up stumbling off in, I tried to tell her which way was which but she was gone before I could even pop my head out the window.
Just on the other side of the corner is a bonfire and party, and half the people have stopped and are looking. I assume it's the party she had just come from, but instead of taking the correct road, she walked another block down and ended up on the utility path that runs in front of my house. My house being the only visible thing around the wooded area. As I turned down the road to go back home, there are two cops stopped at the end of the street with lights flashing, blocking the entire street so I have to turn around and get back out the way I came.
Drunk people don't know how to operate automatic doors. (Hell, most sober people can't seem to operate these automatic van doors...)