Elinda wrote:
Belkira the Tulip wrote:
He never cheated on me. Let me be clear about that. He says he hasn't, and I believe him. However, he has always wanted to. And he always will.
That seems so normal.
Don't we all fantasize about sex with someone who's not our partner? Understanding that it's just fantasy and rarely is the grass any greener in someone else's pasture and vows are designed to keep just such thoughts from ever becoming action is kind of what marriage is all about.
Fantasizing and actively seeking out relationships with women in the hopes it will lead to an affair are two different things. He was consistently being over friendly with other women, which cause an issue with me, and he never seemed to be too concerned about how much it hurt me.
Six years ago we went to counseling because he would not stop talking to his ex girlfriends. He agreed that he would stop, and as far as I knew, it had. I found out last Friday that he had a "fake" Facebook account and he was continuing to talk to at least one of them. But it was his new "friend" at work that was the recent issue, and it was a fight about her and how he acted with her (constantly texting, sending private facebook messages, IM'ing at work all day, etc.) that led to him finally being honest with why he acts like this with every female that gives him the slightest bit of attention. I had asked him not to go to lunch with this chick alone, because I was already concerned about the amount that they were talking. He promised he wouldn't. Turns out he has at least three times.