Gossip Column 3Follow

That's right my fellow Vana'dielians it's time for another edition of all the news that the "respectable" newspapers refuse to print.


Wanted: Dead or Alive - One karma nuker.

Heh whatever this guy was trying it backfired on him/her/it. Some myterious diaper wearing crayon eating nose picking jackanapes went wild on the Shiva forum nuking everyone's Karma. But Shivians fought back and all of sudden there's twice as many scholars on Shiva than before. Hmmmm maybe instead of cursing this guy we should thank him? Nawwwww that'd be nice or something.


Square Enix released this information today. This fall they will be releasing the newest expansion to the Final Fantasy Series "Dawn of the Politicians." This expansion will feature new jobs such as the Politician (this job comes with the job ability "Filibuster". When used this ability prevents a party from going anywhere or doing anything for at least 5 hours. Politician's 2hour ability is "Fund Raiser." This ability forces anyone within a 6 zone radius to contribute 10% of their personal gil to the player.)

Rainbow mage will be the new mage job. (This job comes with the 'Slack Jaw' this ability stuns a mob for 2 min while it tries to figure out if the Rainbow mage is male or female. 'Drag Queen' is the Rainbow Mage's 2hour ability. This is a more powerful version of Slack Jaw. This ability will stun even a god for 5 min.)

And for all you summoners the newest most powerful summons of all will be made available for your summoning pleasures. L.A.P.D. this avatar will bring forth one of the most feared creatures ever, a Los Angeles Police Officer.

Recently there was a disturbance outside the ranger headquarters in Windurst Woods. Hundreds of disenfranchised Dragoons and Dark Knights were seen foaming at the mouth and chanting that the Ranger Job needs to be nerfed. When asked why they said that rangers take their spots in Promybions and general Experience Points Parties. A black mage happened to walk by at this time and pointed this out to the crowd. "Rangers can only hit one mob at a time. Sure he can hit for a lot but try this." ::Black Mage casts Firaga V on the assembled crowd dealing 2500 damage to each player there::

The Star Sybil has declared a natural disaster in the Windurst Woods District. Apparently the Firaga V spell not only nuked a ton of Dragoons and Darks but fire destroyed most of the area including Ranger HQ.

Also recent events in Vanadiel included N00bsearch. One enterprising young researcher decided to do his doctorate thesis on the n00b. The young researcher's head exploded after spending 1 hour with several n00bs.


That's all for this edition of the Gossip Column. This post will be followed by a shameless bump of the prior two columns for your viewing displeasure.

Pffft. Everyone knows that the people with all the money hang out in RuLude Gardnes. Not only is it more civilized up there, but they are all better than us. Damn elitists.

Well it wasn't there until I decided to go streaking through wearing nothing but subligar and a smile :)

I don't go up there because of the high levels.

Besides, Mendi's hot.